Wasn't Thinking
---------------------------
The police responded to an alarm at an elementary school. They responded in time to see a suspect running through the cafeteria and out the back door. They were not able to catch him. But when he ran out, the suspect dropped his cell phone.
The police picked up the phone, searched thought the list of contacts and called one labeled "Ma."
Ma gave the police her son's name.
Just Doing Their Job
---------------------------------------
The police were just doing their job. When someone called 911, then hung up, the police went to that location to see if there was a problem. It turns out that it was a motel where two drug dealers were staying in different rooms. One tried to call the other one in room 119, but dialed 911 by mistake.
Better Not Plan On Being a Career Criminal
----------------------------------------------------------------
A 17-year-old broke into an office furniture store to steal some items. He spent five hours there, doing what?? Well, for one thing, he tried to sell some stolen property using the store's computer. He also viewed pornography. But the thing that gave him away was that he logged into his MySpace account. That didn't make it hard for the police to identify him.
No report on whether or not he bragged about his caper on MySpace.
Dressed for Success, Not
-------------------------------------------
A guy was arrested when he was apprehended after fleeing from a routine traffic stop. It turns out that he was wanted for bank robbery.
When he complained of stomach pain and lost consciousness, he was admitted to a hospital. He must have felt better because he walked out of the hospital and went into a bar. But he forgot to get dressed first. The bar owner called the police when he arrived in a hospital gown with the intravenous needle still in his arm.
Darn Those Phones
------------------------------
A dispatcher in Daytona Beach, Florida, notified the police when she received a call and overheard two teenagers in the process of stealing items from parked cars in a mall parking lot. They were overheard discussing which items would be worth taking. Apparently they had inadvertently dialed 911.
The police arrived and caught them red-handed.
Don't Rob a Liquor Store When You Are Drunk
---------------------------------------------------------------------
A Wyoming man, who was suspected of stealing a bottle of Schnapps from the store, could have planned his escape a little better. He simply ran out of the store and into the nearest building which was the police station.
Apparently realizing where he was, he then ran out of the station. But a dispatcher saw him on the surveillance camera and alerted officers. He was caught nearby, quite drunk, and taken into custody. (They didn't have far to go.)
Quick Response
------------------------------
The police screamed to the scene with sirens blasting. A man had called to report that he had just killed someone and had a gun. When they got there, they found the man who told them he made it up. He claimed that he had been assaulted and wanted the police to respond quickly. They quickly arrested him for filing a false report and sent him to jail.
Snoopy He Isn't
----------------------------
Responding to an alarm going off in a hockey rink, the police found an intoxicated man trying to operate the Zamboni. He had crashed it into a wall. He had also operated two fork lifts, damaging the walls, sprinkler system and hockey net.
He was charged with burglary, criminal mischief, violation of his bail conditions and drunk driving.
Watch What You Do With the Goods
----------------------------------------------------------
A postal worker has been charged with stealing gold which he was supposed to deliver. He made the mistake of pawning it at the same pawn shop which had melted it down to send to a business in Ann Arbor, Michigan. The jeweler at the pawn shop recognized it.
The postal worker has been charged with embezzling.
Check the Weather
----------------------------
An observant cop stopped a woman driving on the Long Island Expressway in the car pool lane and found a mannequin in the passenger seat. She was given a ticket.
What tipped him off? The mannequin was wearing sunglasses and had the visor down. It was an overcast day.
Nice People Swallow
--------------------------------
It seems a certain crook had the bad habit of spitting tobacco juice. And he didn't exactly care where he spit.
A keen eyed detective noticed tobacco juice stains on some papers that had been ransacked at an insurance office where a burglary had occurred. Since none of the ladies in the office chewed tobacco, he reasoned the spit belonged to the thief and took a DNA sample.
Tobacco spit was also found at five other crime scenes in the area. The DNA in all of them matched.
The police had a suspect for the robberies and got a warrant to test his DNA. Voila! It matched. They are expecting a conviction.
Short on Cash. Will This Do?
-----------------------------------------------
A customer at the drive through window of a fast food restaurant apparently didn't have enough cash on him to pay the bill. He offered to pay for his order with marijuana.
The cashier refused and called the police with a description of the vehicle.
Soon after, a police officer spotted the vehicle and pulled it over. An inspection of the car turned up marijuana. The driver was arrested.
Steal Something Smaller Next Time
----------------------------------------------------
A 25-year-old man in Utah decided he wanted to get to Washington to see his mother for Christmas. Not having a car, he hopped into a $500,000 fire truck, blew the air horn and tried to drive away. The fire fighters ran out to see what was happening. He put up a big fight, but they were finally able to subdue him. He never made it to Washington for Christmas.
Too Dumb to Be a Thief
---------------------------------------
The police had no trouble finding this thief. When he used a stolen credit card to buy some cigars, he signed his own name on the receipt. Later he tried to buy some merchandise at a store, but the card came up as stolen. When asked for some identification, he presented his own driver's license.
He Broke Into Where???
----------------------------------------
You really have to wonder about this one. Why would a thief break into a courthouse? I guess when you're drunk, your judgment is a little off, to say the least.
This guy pried open the sliding door to the courthouse and broke into the safe in the lobby. The only problem was that it's an antique safe and there was nothing in it. It was there only for display. In fact, it wasn't locked because the lock was broken.
He was caught when he again tried to pry open to door to get out. He was back inside the same courthouse a few hours later where he was arraigned on a charge of second degree burglary.
Sleeping Beauty
---------------------------
A man came home to his apartment to find the bedroom and kitchen cabinets had been rummaged. He also found the burglar asleep on the living room floor. When the police came and were able to wake him, he was so drunk that he thought he was in his own apartment.
Flubbed Escape
-----------------------------
A man in New Hampshire was stopped at a sobriety checkpoint. After handing over his driver's license and registration, he floored the gas pedal and tried to make a get away (almost running down a police officer). The police caught up with him and found marijuana in his car. He was charged with a DUI, drug possession, disobeying a police officer and reckless driving.
Just a Little Cat Nap
---------------------------------
Police in Arizona responded to a burglar alarm at a gun and police accessories store in Prescott. They found a man inside, fast asleep. He'd apparently entered through a window and claimed that he was driving and got sleepy. He was just looking for a place to take a nap.
He was found with a flashlight, gloves and a bag which contained expensive electronics from the store. He also smelled of alcohol.
The police had a hard time believing his story, especially since there were several warrants out on him. He was arrested.
It's What?
---------------------
A group of teenagers in Arkansas tried to pawn a 62+ pound hunk of metal. The shop owner was suspicious and convinced them that it was only lead. He offered them $30 for it. Since they needed money for gas, they took it.
The police were called and six young people were arrested for allegedly stealing the metal plus various gold and silver coins. It seems the hunk of metal was actually a silver ingot worth $15,000.
Two Birds with One Stone
Police in Montana stopped a car because the driver was swerving. While they were having him do the field sobriety test, the passenger got behind the wheel and drove off.
The police yelled at him and he stopped. He was also sited for drunk driving.
Nerves of Steel She Didn't Have
-----------------------------------------------
A female walked into a bank in Centereach, New York and handed the teller a note, demanding all her cash. The note said she would start shooting if the teller didn't comply.
The teller asked her, "Are you serious?"
The suspect responded by fleeing the bank.
Died in Afghanistan
------------------------------------
A woman in Gloucester, UK, filed a life insurance claim on her husband's $550,000 policy, because he had died in Afghanistan of brain trauma after an accident. She had the death certificate to prove it.
You would think a dead man would not need to see his doctor for anything. But, yet, the husband showed up at his general practitioner a few weeks later.
He had also been living openly in Gloucester, working and paying taxes.
They were both sentenced to community service because (1) they were "less than sophisticated," in other words, dumb and (2) no money was lost.
Makes you wonder about justice.
---------------------------
The police responded to an alarm at an elementary school. They responded in time to see a suspect running through the cafeteria and out the back door. They were not able to catch him. But when he ran out, the suspect dropped his cell phone.
The police picked up the phone, searched thought the list of contacts and called one labeled "Ma."
Ma gave the police her son's name.
Just Doing Their Job
---------------------------------------
The police were just doing their job. When someone called 911, then hung up, the police went to that location to see if there was a problem. It turns out that it was a motel where two drug dealers were staying in different rooms. One tried to call the other one in room 119, but dialed 911 by mistake.
Better Not Plan On Being a Career Criminal
----------------------------------------------------------------
A 17-year-old broke into an office furniture store to steal some items. He spent five hours there, doing what?? Well, for one thing, he tried to sell some stolen property using the store's computer. He also viewed pornography. But the thing that gave him away was that he logged into his MySpace account. That didn't make it hard for the police to identify him.
No report on whether or not he bragged about his caper on MySpace.
Dressed for Success, Not
-------------------------------------------
A guy was arrested when he was apprehended after fleeing from a routine traffic stop. It turns out that he was wanted for bank robbery.
When he complained of stomach pain and lost consciousness, he was admitted to a hospital. He must have felt better because he walked out of the hospital and went into a bar. But he forgot to get dressed first. The bar owner called the police when he arrived in a hospital gown with the intravenous needle still in his arm.
Darn Those Phones
------------------------------
A dispatcher in Daytona Beach, Florida, notified the police when she received a call and overheard two teenagers in the process of stealing items from parked cars in a mall parking lot. They were overheard discussing which items would be worth taking. Apparently they had inadvertently dialed 911.
The police arrived and caught them red-handed.
Don't Rob a Liquor Store When You Are Drunk
---------------------------------------------------------------------
A Wyoming man, who was suspected of stealing a bottle of Schnapps from the store, could have planned his escape a little better. He simply ran out of the store and into the nearest building which was the police station.
Apparently realizing where he was, he then ran out of the station. But a dispatcher saw him on the surveillance camera and alerted officers. He was caught nearby, quite drunk, and taken into custody. (They didn't have far to go.)
Quick Response
------------------------------
The police screamed to the scene with sirens blasting. A man had called to report that he had just killed someone and had a gun. When they got there, they found the man who told them he made it up. He claimed that he had been assaulted and wanted the police to respond quickly. They quickly arrested him for filing a false report and sent him to jail.
Snoopy He Isn't
----------------------------
Responding to an alarm going off in a hockey rink, the police found an intoxicated man trying to operate the Zamboni. He had crashed it into a wall. He had also operated two fork lifts, damaging the walls, sprinkler system and hockey net.
He was charged with burglary, criminal mischief, violation of his bail conditions and drunk driving.
Watch What You Do With the Goods
----------------------------------------------------------
A postal worker has been charged with stealing gold which he was supposed to deliver. He made the mistake of pawning it at the same pawn shop which had melted it down to send to a business in Ann Arbor, Michigan. The jeweler at the pawn shop recognized it.
The postal worker has been charged with embezzling.
Check the Weather
----------------------------
An observant cop stopped a woman driving on the Long Island Expressway in the car pool lane and found a mannequin in the passenger seat. She was given a ticket.
What tipped him off? The mannequin was wearing sunglasses and had the visor down. It was an overcast day.
Nice People Swallow
--------------------------------
It seems a certain crook had the bad habit of spitting tobacco juice. And he didn't exactly care where he spit.
A keen eyed detective noticed tobacco juice stains on some papers that had been ransacked at an insurance office where a burglary had occurred. Since none of the ladies in the office chewed tobacco, he reasoned the spit belonged to the thief and took a DNA sample.
Tobacco spit was also found at five other crime scenes in the area. The DNA in all of them matched.
The police had a suspect for the robberies and got a warrant to test his DNA. Voila! It matched. They are expecting a conviction.
Short on Cash. Will This Do?
-----------------------------------------------
A customer at the drive through window of a fast food restaurant apparently didn't have enough cash on him to pay the bill. He offered to pay for his order with marijuana.
The cashier refused and called the police with a description of the vehicle.
Soon after, a police officer spotted the vehicle and pulled it over. An inspection of the car turned up marijuana. The driver was arrested.
Steal Something Smaller Next Time
----------------------------------------------------
A 25-year-old man in Utah decided he wanted to get to Washington to see his mother for Christmas. Not having a car, he hopped into a $500,000 fire truck, blew the air horn and tried to drive away. The fire fighters ran out to see what was happening. He put up a big fight, but they were finally able to subdue him. He never made it to Washington for Christmas.
Too Dumb to Be a Thief
---------------------------------------
The police had no trouble finding this thief. When he used a stolen credit card to buy some cigars, he signed his own name on the receipt. Later he tried to buy some merchandise at a store, but the card came up as stolen. When asked for some identification, he presented his own driver's license.
He Broke Into Where???
----------------------------------------
You really have to wonder about this one. Why would a thief break into a courthouse? I guess when you're drunk, your judgment is a little off, to say the least.
This guy pried open the sliding door to the courthouse and broke into the safe in the lobby. The only problem was that it's an antique safe and there was nothing in it. It was there only for display. In fact, it wasn't locked because the lock was broken.
He was caught when he again tried to pry open to door to get out. He was back inside the same courthouse a few hours later where he was arraigned on a charge of second degree burglary.
Sleeping Beauty
---------------------------
A man came home to his apartment to find the bedroom and kitchen cabinets had been rummaged. He also found the burglar asleep on the living room floor. When the police came and were able to wake him, he was so drunk that he thought he was in his own apartment.
Flubbed Escape
-----------------------------
A man in New Hampshire was stopped at a sobriety checkpoint. After handing over his driver's license and registration, he floored the gas pedal and tried to make a get away (almost running down a police officer). The police caught up with him and found marijuana in his car. He was charged with a DUI, drug possession, disobeying a police officer and reckless driving.
Just a Little Cat Nap
---------------------------------
Police in Arizona responded to a burglar alarm at a gun and police accessories store in Prescott. They found a man inside, fast asleep. He'd apparently entered through a window and claimed that he was driving and got sleepy. He was just looking for a place to take a nap.
He was found with a flashlight, gloves and a bag which contained expensive electronics from the store. He also smelled of alcohol.
The police had a hard time believing his story, especially since there were several warrants out on him. He was arrested.
It's What?
---------------------
A group of teenagers in Arkansas tried to pawn a 62+ pound hunk of metal. The shop owner was suspicious and convinced them that it was only lead. He offered them $30 for it. Since they needed money for gas, they took it.
The police were called and six young people were arrested for allegedly stealing the metal plus various gold and silver coins. It seems the hunk of metal was actually a silver ingot worth $15,000.
Two Birds with One Stone
Police in Montana stopped a car because the driver was swerving. While they were having him do the field sobriety test, the passenger got behind the wheel and drove off.
The police yelled at him and he stopped. He was also sited for drunk driving.
Nerves of Steel She Didn't Have
-----------------------------------------------
A female walked into a bank in Centereach, New York and handed the teller a note, demanding all her cash. The note said she would start shooting if the teller didn't comply.
The teller asked her, "Are you serious?"
The suspect responded by fleeing the bank.
Died in Afghanistan
------------------------------------
A woman in Gloucester, UK, filed a life insurance claim on her husband's $550,000 policy, because he had died in Afghanistan of brain trauma after an accident. She had the death certificate to prove it.
You would think a dead man would not need to see his doctor for anything. But, yet, the husband showed up at his general practitioner a few weeks later.
He had also been living openly in Gloucester, working and paying taxes.
They were both sentenced to community service because (1) they were "less than sophisticated," in other words, dumb and (2) no money was lost.
Makes you wonder about justice.