This is the list of most famous George Burns quotes that you'd love to share with all your friends.
1. "Too bad that all the people who know how to run the country are busy driving taxicabs and cutting hair."
- George Burns.
2. "I can't afford to die; I'd lose too much money."
- George Burns.
3. "I was brought up to respect my elders, so now I don't have to respect anybody."
- George Burns.
4. "I honestly think it is better to be a failure at something you love than to be a success at something you hate."
- George Burns.
5. "Define your business goals clearly so that others can see them as you do."
- George Burns.
6. "Retirement at sixty-five is ridiculous. When I was sixty-five I still had pimples."
- George Burns.
7. "Someone who makes you laugh is a comedian. Someone who makes you think and then laughs is a humorist."
- George Burns.
8. "The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending, then having the two as close together as possible."
- George Burns.
9. "Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city."
- George Burns.
10. "If I get big laughs, I'm a comedian. If I get little laughs, I'm a humorist. If I get no laughs, I'm a singer."
- George Burns.
11. "If you ask what is the single most important key to longevity, I would have to say it is avoiding worry, stress, and tension."
- George Burns.
12. "No snowflake in an avalanche ever feels responsible."
- George Burns.
13. "When I'm in front of an audience, all that love and vitality sweeps over me and I forget my age."
- George Burns.
14. "Don't stay in bed unless you can make money in bed."
- George Burns.
15. "Acting is all about honesty. If you can fake that, you've got it made."
- George Burns.
16. "When you stop giving and offering something to the rest of the world, it's time to turn out the lights."
- George Burns.
17. "Everyday happiness means getting up in the morning, and you can't wait to finish your breakfast. You can't wait to do your exercises. You can't wait to put on your clothes. You can't wait to get out. And you can't wait to come home, because the soup is hot."
- George Burns.
18. "Fall in love with what you're going to do for a living."
- George Burns.
19. "If you live to be one hundred, you've got it made. Very few people die past that age."
- George Burns.
20. "You know you're getting old when you stoop to tie your shoelaces and wonder what else you could do while you're down there."
- George Burns.
21. "I look to the future because that's where I'm going to spend the rest of my life."
- George Burns.
22. "A young mind in a healthy body is a wonderful thing. Especially for an old man with an open night."
- George Burns.
23. "With the collapse of vaudeville new talent has no place to stink."
- George Burns.
24. "Love is a lot like a backache. It doesn't show up on x-rays, but you know it's there."
- George Burns.
25. "You can't help getting older, but you don't have to get old."
- George Burns.
26. "Happiness? A good cigar, a good meal, a good cigar and a good woman - or a bad woman"
- George Burns.
27. "The Pope's entrance was stunning. Maybe the Catholics know about miracles, and maybe they know about saints, but they've never received enough credit for what they know about show business."
- George Burns, 'Gracie: A Love Story', 1988.
28. "The Man in Jail: Hey, bud! What are you in for?
George Burns: Stupidity."
- 'The George Burns And Gracie Allen Show', 1950.
29. "Say, Goodnight Gracie."
- 'The George Burns And Gracie Allen Show', 1950.
30. "I know some fools who have a lot of money, but they won't tell me how they got it, and I won't tell them."
- George Burns, 'Dr. Burns Prescription For Happiness', 1984.
31. "Gracie Allen: How long does it take for a birthday cake to fly to San Francisco?
George Burns: Well, that's a normal, everyday question, so I'll give you a normal, everyday answer. What are you talking about?"
- 'The George Burns And Gracie Allen Show', 1950.
32. "I don't want to be anything that I'm not. Now, I'm a singer, that's a talent I was born with... and that's the one I'm dying with. "
- George Burns, 'The George Burns And Gracie Allen Show', 1950.